I just found out that I am pregnant, and I am feeling excited and terrified at the same time. My husband wants to tell his family, but I am not ready to have these conversations with anyone right now. You know, the:
- “How do you feel?”
- “Do you want a boy or girl?”
- “Do you have a name picked out?”.
These questions may seem harmless to the “regular” person, but these questions, once I start answering them, can lead to me having to explain my fears about the pregnancy over and over again. I am in my mid-thirties and my younger sibling has DS. I am terrified that my child will have a disability.
I am already my sibling’s primary caregiver. The thought of now having another person under my care, who will need lifelong care, stresses me the heck out.
And if the anxiety and worry were not enough, this whole thing is causing some tension between my husband and I, as I don’t want him to say anything to anyone, and right now, I get too emotional to fully explain myself to him and therefore, he just doesn’t know why I am behaving the way I am.
What should be a happy moment has turned into anything but. I wish I didn’t feel this way…but I do.
Caregiver: Kamala Country: UK